book review : after i do
Genre: Romance
Reading age: 16+
Rating: 8/10
You’ll like this if you’ve ever experienced a long term romantic relationship.
They say third times a charm, so I decided to pick up another Taylor Jenkins Reid book, and let’s just say I truly think she might be becoming one of my favourite authors.
Every book I’ve read by Miss Jenkins Reid is so different, from the themes to the way it’s formatted. If it wasn’t for the same quality of writing, you’d think that the books were all written by different people. After I Do is a love story in its core but more than that, I think it’s a story of self love and self discovery. Like most of us, I usually read to escape my reality, so I don’t like reading things that hit too close to home. But in a way it was refreshing to read about different approaches to love and the different journeys relationships can take. There is a real beauty in realism, and knowing that you’re not alone.
The story follows the lives of Lauren and Ryan who were college (university!) sweethearts that married soon after graduating. However almost a decade later, their relationship isn’t as wonderful at it once seemed and they’ve grown to resent eachother for it. There are many reasons for this, and throughout the story we uncover the different factors which contribute to the downfall of their relationship, and consequently their marriage. In a desperate attempt to avoid divorce, they decide to take some time apart to rediscover their spark, or call it quits once and for all.
Jenkins Reid really steered away from the glamourised idea of love, we often yearn for in books. Although we’re all guilty of developing dependencies on our loved ones, she really hammered home that there is a difference between needing someone in your life and wanting them in your life. This is not to be confused with living in isolation, because we definitely still see Lauren surrounded by love in other ways in the absence of Ryan. The important distinction here is that it’s not the type of love that’s important, but experiencing love, in whatever form that may be. The love between family is a big example of this in the book. That being said, Jenkins Reid does show that wanting someone is just as important as needing someone, and although we often chase the latter - a healthy relationship should be a choice.
Another subtle theme I enjoyed in the book was how upbringing plays a part in the way you experience relationships. Lauren grew up in a home where she was one of three siblings to a single mum, who had to work hard to fend for her family. In addition to this, she is the eldest child and feels she has a lot of responsibility on her shoulders to pave the way for her siblings. Growing up in this setting can often lead to you deprioritising your needs for the sake of others and when this translates to your romantic relationship, it’s a recipe for disaster. I also think growing up with a single mum, although not explicitly expressed this way, probably made Lauren desire a nuclear family and therefore feel obliged to uphold the traditions of marriage. I liked that Jenkins Reid showed that the grass is not always greener on the other side.
The book is a really easy read and given how basic the storyline sounds, I’m surprised how much I enjoyed it. Relationships are really complex in itself and by focusing on this, rather than creating an abstract storyline for the characters to live in, the story really achieved what I think it set out to do. When I finished this book, I felt like I had read a self help book in a way. Being in a long term relationship myself that also started in University made me realise just how much of my relationship I still have to experience. And I think I have learnt a thing or two about sustaining the longevity of my relationship.
Buy it here: https://amzn.eu/d/3Ql1psJ
Reading age: 16+
Rating: 8/10
You’ll like this if you’ve ever experienced a long term romantic relationship.
They say third times a charm, so I decided to pick up another Taylor Jenkins Reid book, and let’s just say I truly think she might be becoming one of my favourite authors.
Every book I’ve read by Miss Jenkins Reid is so different, from the themes to the way it’s formatted. If it wasn’t for the same quality of writing, you’d think that the books were all written by different people. After I Do is a love story in its core but more than that, I think it’s a story of self love and self discovery. Like most of us, I usually read to escape my reality, so I don’t like reading things that hit too close to home. But in a way it was refreshing to read about different approaches to love and the different journeys relationships can take. There is a real beauty in realism, and knowing that you’re not alone.
The story follows the lives of Lauren and Ryan who were college (university!) sweethearts that married soon after graduating. However almost a decade later, their relationship isn’t as wonderful at it once seemed and they’ve grown to resent eachother for it. There are many reasons for this, and throughout the story we uncover the different factors which contribute to the downfall of their relationship, and consequently their marriage. In a desperate attempt to avoid divorce, they decide to take some time apart to rediscover their spark, or call it quits once and for all.
Jenkins Reid really steered away from the glamourised idea of love, we often yearn for in books. Although we’re all guilty of developing dependencies on our loved ones, she really hammered home that there is a difference between needing someone in your life and wanting them in your life. This is not to be confused with living in isolation, because we definitely still see Lauren surrounded by love in other ways in the absence of Ryan. The important distinction here is that it’s not the type of love that’s important, but experiencing love, in whatever form that may be. The love between family is a big example of this in the book. That being said, Jenkins Reid does show that wanting someone is just as important as needing someone, and although we often chase the latter - a healthy relationship should be a choice.
Another subtle theme I enjoyed in the book was how upbringing plays a part in the way you experience relationships. Lauren grew up in a home where she was one of three siblings to a single mum, who had to work hard to fend for her family. In addition to this, she is the eldest child and feels she has a lot of responsibility on her shoulders to pave the way for her siblings. Growing up in this setting can often lead to you deprioritising your needs for the sake of others and when this translates to your romantic relationship, it’s a recipe for disaster. I also think growing up with a single mum, although not explicitly expressed this way, probably made Lauren desire a nuclear family and therefore feel obliged to uphold the traditions of marriage. I liked that Jenkins Reid showed that the grass is not always greener on the other side.
The book is a really easy read and given how basic the storyline sounds, I’m surprised how much I enjoyed it. Relationships are really complex in itself and by focusing on this, rather than creating an abstract storyline for the characters to live in, the story really achieved what I think it set out to do. When I finished this book, I felt like I had read a self help book in a way. Being in a long term relationship myself that also started in University made me realise just how much of my relationship I still have to experience. And I think I have learnt a thing or two about sustaining the longevity of my relationship.
Buy it here: https://amzn.eu/d/3Ql1psJ
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